When was the last time you made a new friend? Not a friend to exchange jokes at work, but a really close person whom you called would in a difficult situation. If you're over 20, you've probably wondered what to do if you don't have friends.

Suspects: work, family, “little time”

Many people guess why friendship fades into the background with age. We are building a career 40 hours a week, we have a family and children, but there is no time left for everything else.

Study How Do Women Spend Their Time?, conducted by Real Simple and the Families and Work Institute, found that 52% of women ages 25 to 54 have fewer than 90 free minutes per day, and 29% of women have fewer than 45 minutes. That's not enough to even watch an episode of Game of Thrones, let alone create friendships.

It is unlikely that these indicators are very different for men.

When a person reaches the middle of his life, his youthful impulses to explore everything disappear irrevocably. Priorities change and people often become picky about their friends.

Alex Williams, reporter for The New York Times

No matter how wide your inner circle, fatalism spares no one. Adolescence and student years are behind us. Now the time has come for “friends by situation” or just good acquaintances.

When people become adults, it is as if an invisible barrier appears between them. They get to know each other, have fun, but don’t spend as much time together as before.

As people age, they are less likely to form friendships. At the same time, they become closer with the friends they already have.

Laura L. Carstensen, professor of psychology at Stanford University

She suggested that the human psyche reacts to significant life events, this includes the date of 30 years. The realization comes that life is shortening. It's time to stop learning new things, we need to pay more attention to what is here and now.

Friends are no longer needed for survival

Another reason why we struggle to expand our inner circle later in life is because it is no longer necessary. In youth, friendship is an important part of personal and social development. We need friends to understand who we really are and how to decide.

Of course, no one thinks about this when making friends at school. We are not particularly picky and start being friends just like that. Do you sit at the same desk with me and also hate the teacher? High five!

Once personality is formed, we need something more to become friends. Circumstances alone are no longer enough. You may have the same problems and views with a person, you will share them, and then go your separate ways and only politely greet each other.

What can you do about it?

It would seem, well, okay, why new friends, because there are old ones. But if an adult loses his previous connections, what to do then?

In the lives of many of us, there are three important things missing: emotional intimacy, repeated unplanned interactions and. Without them, you cannot build strong relationships. So if you're around 30, you can't make real friends anymore? Not at all.

Tracy Moore, a writer at Jezebel, suggests that you just need to change your attitude: “Let's say you moved to a new city and you don't know anyone there. Or old friends now seem so impudent that you are even surprised how you communicated with them over the past 10 years. In any case, you should perceive the search for buddies as an exciting quest.”

Of course, you need to get out of the house and communicate with people with similar interests.

Here are some examples:

• look for thematic meetings in your city, for example, through communities of interest to you on social networks;
• sign up for courses: dancing, yoga, decorating master classes, wrestling;
• get and walk with other owners and their pets;
• travel, come up with a new hobby, sign up as a volunteer.

Strive to where life is in full swing. Chat with different people. It is quite possible that you will find a friend when you least expect it.

There are also advantages

No matter how difficult it may be to expand your inner circle as an adult, the game is worth the candle. Mature friendships have many advantages over children's friendships:

• your relationship will be based on common interests that may not have existed while studying at school or university;
• no restrictions: make friends with a large age difference or on the Internet;
• friendship will be more relaxed: an adult is unlikely to be offended because he knows that everyone has things to do;
• you will begin to value time with loved ones more.

As you get to know yourself, new friendships can become deeper than those left over from your high school years. And like any good relationship, over time it will become deeper and stronger.

There is an opinion that all people are actually very lonely. And rarely does anyone manage to comprehend truly true friendship. They also say that friendship can only appear at a young age while a person does not yet have a family or other obligations. And it ends with the advent of a family and especially children.

What do psychologists think about this? How and where to find a true friend?

This may sound simple and banal, but honestly, we spend most of the time allotted to us in the company of people we do not choose. First, these are our parents and our brothers and sisters, then our classmates and fellow students, and then our colleagues at work. It is in this state of “no choice” that our friends appear. It turns out that the pure chance by which we meet other people determines our choice of friends in the future. After a year of student life, if you ask us to name our friends, as a rule, we name those who sat next to us or in the same row during classes. It’s a coincidence, and only then we choose according to the criteria that unite us - joint efforts to overcome difficulties, joint events where everyone takes their share of participation, as well as joint recreation and interests. It is clear that real friends are not the same as virtual acquaintances. The main property of the Internet is not the expansion of social contacts, but the fact that from now on and forever closeness implies spiritual closeness. Distance does not play a role in this case.

Why does it become more difficult over the years to find friends for the rest of your life? Because the value in a relationship is in its history, in the time spent together, in shared experiences, in memories of ups and downs. Our best friends know us better than we know ourselves and believe in us when we have already lost hope. Our own life consists of a union of destinies, those who are next to us. We try to gather around us people who wish us well and do good. Whatever is in our hands - a children's scoop from the sandbox, or a Parker pen - relationships are important, not communications. Hence the conclusion - you need to keep in touch with those with whom you would meet and communicate with pleasure even without the Internet. And you need to take care of your old friends. You can't fool them, even if you fool yourself. You can tell them something that you are not at all proud of, but at the same time you can be proud that you have such friends. When surrounded by friends you feel happier; friends are the people who love us, although they know everything about us.

Why are so many people now lonely and without friends? If a person has difficulty communicating and having friends, then the main advice is to make friends with yourself. To start. All our achievements and all our difficulties begin with ourselves and here lies the lack of friends in our lives, both in early childhood and in adulthood. Among my close friends, I can tell you about my friend, whom we also met by pure chance, in kindergarten, where we both took our children. My daughter was doing ballroom dancing at the time, she was 5 years old at the time and we needed a boy partner. While talking about this in the locker room, my friend agreed to bring her son to the dance. Our children danced together for no more than 3 months, and our friendship, which began with an ordinary conversation between two mothers, continues to this day. Our children are already 29 years old and for the last 10 years we have been living in different countries, since a friend’s family moved to Moscow. Despite the distances between us, we have not lost interest in our communication, respect for each other and sincere attention to our joys and sorrows. We have already been able to “eat our share of salt” together and the quality of our relationship is getting better and better. We manage to visit each other, our children see before them an example of such a strong friendship of their mothers, and I really consider myself happy that I have a close friend named Tatyana, who was next to me and in joy when my daughter got ready to get married and was sad when I lost my mother. The most valuable thing in friendship is when you can be yourself and not worry that someone might not like you.

An interesting topic to think about. I will voice my understanding of this issue and my attitude.

Lately, I have become more and more inclined to believe that friendship is a certain form of relationship between people. Built on the basis of mutually beneficial interests.

Accordingly, the more points of contact between people, the “stronger” the friendship. Common interests, common past, events experienced together, emotions, spending time together, etc.

“They also say that friendship can only appear at a young age” - I think this depends less on age, and more on a person’s ability to get closer to other people, to make closer contact. And this happens differently for everyone; for some, this ability is lost with age, while for others it develops. Here, of course, lifestyle and family circumstances, temperament and awareness of existence have their influence.

“How and where to find a true friend?” - you can find him wherever you meet people and get closer. But whether he will become a friend or acquaintance in the future or will not become anyone will depend on the need for you to communicate with this person at the given moment, in this situation.

Good friends to you!

The need for communication always exists. We all need communication. and it’s better if it is emotionally warm and rich.

The ability to build friendships is a kind of art, and practice in this begins from childhood. Often, the inability to communicate, complexes and fears in communication are carried over into adulthood, which gives rise to certain difficulties.

Therefore, parents should be especially attentive to how their child communicates with peers and other people.

Currently, there are many trainings aimed at developing communication skills, sometimes they are very useful.

If you do not have developed communication skills, this does not mean that “all is lost.” Communication skills can be developed and improved. Fears in communication can be overcome.

How? Firstly, your life experience. You can always rely on him. Analyze: how do people around you react to your behavior, your words? What causes a positive reaction, what causes a negative reaction. Use it.

Secondly, psychological literature. You can find many useful articles on the Internet and many useful books on store shelves.

In general, the ability to make friends is a special gift. And those to whom it is given are happy people. You can learn to be friends throughout your life. The main thing is not to forget that friends are given to us in order to learn to live not only for ourselves, but also for others. Friends help you see the main thing and not waste your time on trifles. Friends help us accept ourselves as we are, without embellishment. He who knows how to make friends will never be left without a friend. Develop this gift in yourself and you will always have friends in your life.

We are all truly alone from an existential point of view. We come into this world alone and leave alone. Everyone has to go their own way in life and make fateful decisions.

It’s good if there are close people nearby with whom you feel warm and comfortable, you can relax and take a break for a while, complain, get understanding and support. Or, on the contrary, have a lot of fun and recharge your energy, rejoice together at someone’s good luck or success. That is, to share both joy and sorrow.

I call true friendship a relationship where there is closeness, sincerity, openness, acceptance, freedom to say “yes” and no”; when you can choose a comfortable psychological distance for today and change it tomorrow. In close relationships there is an opportunity to openly discuss misunderstandings that arise and difficulties, apologizing and being asked for clumsiness and mistakes.

It is easier for parents when a teenager “hangs out” somewhere on the street or sits at home at the computer than to bring home a whole bunch of friends. And this is completely in vain, since in this way we continue to raise a teenager for whom direct methods of education are no longer effective, and we see with whom he communicates, that is, we control the situation.

The ability to make friends shapes many other human abilities. First of all, it is the willingness to come to the aid of another person in difficult times.

And, one of the most important aspects of friendship is the “prevention” of loneliness.

The need for friendship is in each of us!

The ability for friendship exists in each of us, but in order for it to manifest itself and develop, another person is needed!

And here there are several options - either to be afraid of close relationships, including friendship, and then find different explanations - there is no time, I don’t believe in the truth of friendship, etc. Or you can openly meet friendship, that is, be a friendly person and ready to be friends, understanding that this is a certain risk - being vulnerable, but also many advantages - accepting support, sharing your own feelings, etc. And then like-minded people will definitely meet on the path of life!

And for what is dear and important to us, we can always find both time and opportunity!

To do this, first of all, you need to work through negative experiences regarding friendly relations, realize the advantages of friendship and have the desire to be friends!

"I do not have friends!" - you say? Turn your gaze to... yourself. It's not about them, those who could become your friend, buddy. It is you who, perhaps, do not need friends, or your views on what a friend should be do not coincide with the views of those with whom you would like to make friends, or you do not know how to build relationships, maintaining the “give-take” balance, or you choose those with whom it is impossible to build friendly relations... There are many options for your loneliness, if a person begins to be “stressed” by the current situation - it is important for him to understand the reasons for this condition of yours - you have a reason, it is unique, perhaps it seems that it is invisible, you can’t feel it, you’re looking in the wrong place where it’s hidden!

From my own experience, from the experience of my parents, I can say with confidence that most people are lucky :) - they have friends, and loyal and bosom ones! And you can make friends at any age: there are those from kindergarten, and those whom you met at the 50th anniversary of a colleague, and at 75 you can meet a youthful man of 72 years old and communicate... and how many years, how many years have been allotted by fate! Be open to communication, but also do not violate the boundaries of the person with whom you want to communicate closely - find that “golden mean” that is comfortable for everyone! A friend is not always the one who will be with you in difficult times (a classic definition of friendship!), but the one who can survive your happiness, be with you when you feel good!! How many friends have disappeared from women who got married or got rich, “fell away” from those who achieved excellent results (“she was a C student, and I was an excellent student”!)!

They are friends with families and friends with their personal friends! There is no need to dare your girlfriends and partners’ friends - this will only harm you! For example, a husband will not always exchange his friends with whom he has traveled, fished, written books, etc. for years - for you :)! Respect the privacy of your partners!

Friends are an integral part of every person's life. The subpersonality “Friend/Girlfriend” is important, just like “woman”, “man”, colleague”, “hostess” and others!

Make friends with... yourself and feel what to do to make friends appear! Those who want to be friends with you will come running, if you like yourself, then others will too!

With the advent of a family, and especially children, friendship does not disappear, but moves to a different level of relationship. And it disappeared... Well, that means it wasn’t friendship!

And a lonely person is born and dies. And in the interim period - he lives and makes friends (including)!

Tell me who you are and I will tell you why you have no friends.

"I do not have friends. Tell me what to do to find them?” - This question, which is usually asked by young people, can often be seen on forums and websites where psychological assistance is provided. And the most common advice given in response is to communicate more. The advice seems to be correct, but it is not suitable for everyone. For some it turns out to be difficult to implement or even “not about that”. The fact is that it is very general, and the reasons why people have the feeling of experiencing a lack of friends are different; behind it are different needs, different motives and life situations. So, before you try to independently correct the current situation in life with a lack of friendship or advise others on how to cope with it, you should pay attention to the situation of a person who is pining for the absence of friends.

Among the variety of situations that lead a person to painful experiences of lack of friends, it is useful to distinguish at least three different types. After all, an accurate understanding of the situation allows you to choose the right strategy for exiting it.

1) Bgoing beyond the boundaries of a stable social circle that has developed over a long period of life.

Many people who have been in the same group for a long time, where relationships have developed that are quite favorable for their personality, develop a strong attachment to this group. Often circumstances develop in such a way that a person is forced, for some external reason, to leave her. For example, parents moved to another city, or even to another country, and a person has to go to a new school, to a new class, or an older person transferred to another institute, moved to a new job. There he has to adapt to new formal and informal rules of group interaction, a different way of life. And the members of the new team do not always welcome him with open arms.

The more tightly a person continues to hold on to his past in this situation, the more difficult it is for him to adapt to a new place. He does not notice that he looks at his new comrades through “skeptical glasses,” constantly comparing the old team and the new one, not in favor of the new one. People naturally feel this mood, and in turn are in no hurry to break the ice of alienation.....

To improve the situation, a person needs to work on letting go of the past and accepting the present, accepting new people, trying to understand them and starting to live here and now. Then friends will appear...

2) Losing my best friend.

A situation where someone had a very deep personal relationship with one person, considered him his best friend and suddenly lost this relationship, can arise when the friend died or on his own initiative broke off the relationship. This situation is somewhat similar to the first situation. It also involves a fixation on the good past and non-acceptance of the changes that have occurred in life. However, here the deeper layers of a person’s personality are affected, therefore the internal work of accepting changes requires greater delicacy and depth, and it should be built according to the same type as working with the loss of loved ones or the breakup of a love relationship.

3) Lack of an appropriate parental model of friendships.

An equally common reason for the painful absence of friends, despite the fact that a person makes truly heroic efforts to find friends, is most often the inappropriate model of friendships that a person learns in relationships with his own parents. After all, it is here that he first learns what it means to be a SIGNIFICANT OTHER for someone - that is, a FRIEND, and also, no less important, what it means to be in a relationship with SIGNIFICANT OTHERS. It is not necessary that the relationship with the parents was “bad”. However, in them the person did not have the opportunity to discover and develop his abilities to be a friend to other people.

Having realized the existence of a problem, you can solve it, find new samples, extract and process the bitter experience of unsuccessful attempts. If independent attempts do not lead to success for too long, you can turn to a psychologist for help, the main thing is not to give up.

When a person has no friends, no girlfriend/boyfriend, no close people, it is always very painful. What to do in this case? How to get out of the situation? First you need to understand that there are no hopeless situations. Well, then - go in search of this very solution to the problem of loneliness, in search of yourself.

Why are others doing well, but I have no friends?
What are the reasons for loneliness? Why are people lonely in different ways?
How to fix the situation when I don't have a single friend?

“Help, I have no friends at all” - this is the cry from the heart that greets us on many forums about human relationships. People write pages after pages, pouring out their misery on virtual paper. They talk in detail about themselves, their lives, their desires. And from these stories it is clear that they are all pleasant, normal people, but for some reason, for some reason completely mysterious to them, they cannot find at least one friend in this world, which is literally overflowing with people. How is such a paradox possible?

Until recently, the problem of loneliness was not so acute; people had other problems: they starved, fought, fought for the ideas of religion, loved and hated.

Today everything has changed - the world is filled with people who are languishing with the question: “why don’t I have friends?” At the same time, they live in multi-storey buildings, every day they come into contact with hundreds of people in crowded transport, at work, and in shops. But all people seem to be in individual capsules: they are separated from each other. Even those with whom we are forced to communicate more or less closely, for example, neighbors, colleagues or visitors to a sports club, are not suitable either for the role of a good friend or for the role of a loved one.

Why did this situation arise? Why do I have no friends at all and no way to find them?

The origins of the problem of lack of friends must be sought deep in the subconscious of a person. System-vector thinking helps to cope with this, explaining the processes that are currently happening in human society.

Firstly, people understand each other less and less. Representatives of different vectors have different desires. He is interested in money, and I am interested in flights to the moon and the secrets of the universe. He is interested in dogs, and I am interested in bicycles. We won't be able to sit on a bench, dangle our legs and have a nice conversation with each other every evening - we'll just be bored with each other.

Secondly, society itself is now in a skin phase of development, which implies individualism and standardization. Close ties in families are blurred; a brother or sister can be completely distant people, literally strangers. We become more and more egocentric, trying to think more about ourselves and less about others.

It is not surprising that under the influence of these and other factors, it is difficult for a person to find friends and a soul mate. However, an even greater problem lies in the peculiarities of our character. It’s no secret that not everyone has problems with loneliness.

Sound engineers often suffer from loneliness. Although it is he who dreams of a desert island or a flight to Mars all alone without returning to earth, yet it is he who feels his loneliness more than others and suffers immensely from the fact that there are no people in the world with whom he could share his thoughts.

The sound engineer himself often does not behave very friendly. If he is invited to a party or a meeting of classmates, he will find a thousand reasons not to come. In communication, he is either silent because he is closed in his thoughts, or he speaks in such a way that no one understands him. Or generally speaks on topics that are not interesting to those around him.

The sound guy sees his problem and realizes it - he says sadly, “I don’t have a single friend, I’m all alone, I’m some kind of outcast.” But in fact, he is the one who doesn’t feel people are interesting. Those around him seem primitive and simple. This happens because the sound guy feels smarter than others and tries to prove his point of view, but they don’t want to listen to him. Therefore, people who have just met try to avoid the sound man in the future, and he himself does not really want a repeat of their meeting. The problem is that this situation repeats itself with every new person you meet along the way. It's not surprising that I end up with the persistent feeling that I have no friends at all.

Another psychotype who also suffers from the fact that he has no friends is the spectator. In general, a visual person is always an extrovert, he is focused outward. And most often there are people next to him with whom he can share his loneliness. But only if he knows how to build an emotional connection with other people, he feels them as close people, kindred in spirit. Not possessing such a skill, he does not “give” the emotion out, but, on the contrary, demands it to himself. So it turns out that it seems like there are girlfriends and friends with whom you can chat and go to the cinema, but the feeling of loneliness remains - “why do I have no friends at all?” - such a person asks himself a question from time to time.

If a person has an audio-visual connection, then this combination often turns into an explosive mixture of snobbery and arrogance. Most of the people around him seem to be cattle, not intelligent, not of the same level as him. People irritate him, and intrusive people doubly irritate him. With such an attitude towards life, it is very difficult to find friends, a loved one and in general at least someone with whom you can talk.

Help: I ​​have no friends!

Despite the complexity of the problem of loneliness, it can be fixed. But to do this, there is no need to specifically force someone to be friends with you. And you don’t even have to change yourself to please others - talk about topics that are interesting to others at parties, smile at people we don’t like, and so on. All this will not help, but will only worsen the situation.

The only thing we need is for us to need them, to manifest sincere interest to them. Do not try to prove your point of view, do not conduct a constant internal dialogue with yourself, so that when there is a pause in the conversation, insert your wise thought, do not splash out your emotions. On the contrary - to listen, to delve into another person, to feel his suffering, his pain, his joy - to show empathy for him and to feel him mentally. After all, only at first glance it seems that it is uninteresting and primitive. But in fact, if you look very closely at a person, without labeling him, then there is nothing more interesting than his behavior, worldview, actions and desires. This does not mean that you need to be friends with every person you meet, but DO NOT have hostility or irritation towards other people- this is the first stage towards finding friends in the future.

But how can you arouse in yourself a sincere, genuine interest in others? This can be taught by the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan, which systematizes and reveals the characteristics of the human psyche. With an understanding of the motives of a person’s actions and words, communication with him becomes very interesting. And people feel such attention, they will be happy to communicate and be friends with those who are interested in them.

Our environment determines our life

For a sound artist, it is important not just to find friends, but also to find the right friends. Despite the fact that each person is interesting in his own way, this does not mean that everyone can become that kindred spirit with whom you can share, communicate, and spend time.

You can learn systematically choose the right environment for yourself- people who have the same interests in life, the same worldview. Sound artists and sound viewers are intellectuals who are interested in a huge spectrum of life. Therefore, they can only find true comrades among people like themselves. Among those who are involved in important matters, discoveries, achievements, global plans and ideas that concern not one person or company, but all of humanity.

Friends for any person are a kind of shield from the problems happening around. You can always trust them, their help is invaluable, and their support is priceless. But what should those people do who are lonely in life and have no friends? First you need to understand the psychological characteristics of this problem.

Lack of friends: the opinion of psychologists

Psychologists have long come to the conclusion that a person needs communication to live a normal life in society. Moreover, he needs to communicate not only with casual acquaintances, but also with those who can be called friends. Such dialogue not only enriches the inner world, but also helps to get rid of existing problems.

If a person does not have such a social circle, the reason may be the following:

Friends are not only those who can listen to a person, but also a group of people who can maintain a dialogue with him. This is why it is so important to find a company of like-minded people with similar views and hobbies. Psychologists say that in this case it will be easier to maintain contact, because you want to meet like-minded people, you want to attend various events of interest with them.

Many people even believe that they have no need for friends. Communication with society is replaced by relatives, as well as numerous colleagues. However, relatives are not always fair in their judgments, and colleagues often do not care about a person’s personal problems. That is why it is important to have at least one friend in this life with whom you can joke and cry.

Lack of time is just an excuse behind which a reluctance to meet someone is hidden. Perhaps this is due to the person’s complexes, or perhaps due to the difference in his views with the beliefs of his friends. If a person really wants to communicate with one or another circle of like-minded people, he will always find time for this.

One way or another, such social isolation can cause serious problems. According to psychologists, without wanting to communicate with anyone, a person cannot express his emotions and thoughts. As a result, he has to go through all the critical situations that happen in life alone.

How to find friends

Having finally realized that everyone needs a minimum social circle, a person asks the question, what to do next? In such a situation, there is only one way out: as soon as possible. What can be done for this?

Modern technologies give people a lot of opportunities. Now he can make friends not only with his roommate, but also with an elderly German or a young American woman in different parts of the planet.

In such a situation, any communication in a positive way is encouraged: you can invite a colleague to go to a bar after work, you can attend an alumni meeting, or meet someone at an exhibition in a museum.

Often psychologists are faced with the fact that absolutely happy people attend their sessions with only one purpose - to talk about life with at least someone. They do not need psychological support, they are not bothered by internal demons. Due to severe psychological isolation, they simply need to speak out, even if the listener is a complete stranger.

Against the backdrop of a lack of friendly relationships, not only complexes can develop, but also numerous problems in career and family life. No one will help such a person with advice after a quarrel with his husband, no one will support him after his dismissal, and as a result, the person will sooner or later fall into depression. That is why you should always look for friends, regardless of whether a person is 15 years old or 75.

Loneliness as a problem of the 21st century and the reason for the lack of friends

Psychologists have long been sounding the alarm, believing that loneliness is the main problem of modern humanity. In a global sense, it turns into universal hatred and tension in political relations.

A social culture has even emerged in Japan, whose adherents call themselves hikikomori. Such people do not leave home; they work mainly via the Internet and also have contact with the outside world. The lack of real contact with the world results in the fact that hikikomori have no friends, and this leads to complete social isolation, deterioration of the psychological state and even madness.

Similar problems are observed all over the world, and therefore psychologists urge not to be afraid, to make new acquaintances. Not all people can be allowed into your inner circle, trusting them with your own secrets. However, through trial and error, it will be possible to find those very, only ones, shoulder to shoulder with whom it will be possible to overcome any adversity.

Finding friends on the Internet: modern problems and dangers

Making friends with someone while studying at the institute is good, but modern technology gives a person the opportunity to find friends using the World Wide Web. It is important to remember the following dangers:

The Internet should be considered only as a bridge between people, helping them find each other. However, online communication should not replace a person’s real contacts.

Sometimes modern people, accustomed to achieving the maximum in everything, feel that their social circle is too limited. However, psychologists have long noted that for the harmonious development of personality and existence in society, you do not need to have dozens of friends. Sometimes two or three people who are capable of absolute mutual understanding are enough.

A friend is not someone who should appear on the first call, but someone who will always be there in difficult times, despite his own problems and possible troubles in life. Sometimes maintaining a friendship over decades is as difficult as maintaining a marriage. However, nothing in the world helps a person as much as a conversation with someone who fully understands him, while giving competent advice and support in difficult moments of life.

Irina, Petrozavodsk

“Life without friends is a nightmare!” - many will say and they will not be so wrong, because even convinced introverts sometimes need friendly support. But what if you have no friends? First, figure out what you mean by the concept of “friend” and decide whether you really don’t have such people around you, not a single one who could be considered a friend.

What should I do if I have no friends at all?

So, you thought and decided “I have no friends at all, and I don’t know how to live without them,” if that’s the case, then you urgently need to look for them. Moreover, now it is important to simply find friends for communication; you should not immediately install the “looking for a best friend” program for yourself. Because you don’t become such friends right away, so you just need to start communicating more. Decide for yourself where you will do this, based on where you spend most of your time. The first thing that comes to mind is work (study) and the Internet. But you shouldn’t limit yourself to just them; maybe you’ve been meaning to learn how to dance salsa or do yoga for a long time? Well, go ahead and make new friends at the same time. And if you have a dog, that’s generally wonderful - pet owners always have something to talk about - first about the tricks of feeding and training, and then maybe you’ll become good friends.

The main thing is not to be afraid to start a conversation first, show sincerity - you are probably an interesting interlocutor, so don’t be afraid to show it to others.

What to do if you have no friends at work?

Many people complain that they don’t have any friends at all, but that they can’t establish friendly relations with colleagues at work. Think about it, do you really need it? Good communication with colleagues is great, but friendship is not always good for work. There are so many stories about former friends who were at odds with work. Therefore, if everything is fine with your communication and friends outside of your work team, then you should not worry about their absence from work.

What to do if you have no real friends?

It happens - there seem to be a lot of friends, but not a single real one. What to do in this case? To begin with, once again review your list of friends and make sure that there really is no one with whom you “ate a pound of salt.” If you understand that this is indeed the case, then is it worth trying to understand the reason? Maybe it's you? Do you often “cry” to your friends about your problems, not wanting to listen to them? Do you give in to your friends in some way or do you constantly impose your opinion on them? If you have problems with communication and respecting other people’s desires, then it will be difficult to find a true friend - they simply won’t be able to see your vulnerable, gentle soul behind the thorns.

Well, what should you do if among your existing friends no one is suitable for the role of a real one? You have only one way - to look for new friends and do everything so that one of your new acquaintances becomes your best friend.

What to do if you have no friends?

People suffering from boredom and loneliness are traditionally advised to communicate with friends more often. What to do if these same friends are not available? The obvious option is to start looking for them, and you will find a person to communicate with and have fun. Well, if you can’t establish contact with anyone, don’t be upset, use your free time, as a respite, as preparation for grandiose achievements. In the meantime, do something nice for yourself, recharge yourself with positivity - people will gravitate towards a smiling and happy person.