Remember or write down what answers you give. Do you agree with the statement: the only thing worth living for is children?

A No;
B I completely agree;
IN children are part of your life, but not all;
G it all depends on what kind of children.

Let's say you have to hire a babysitter. How will you look for it?

A you have the most ordinary child, and he needs the most ordinary nanny;
B Nothing is a pity for the baby - the nanny must be the best. But where can I get one?
IN you invite a nanny only under the guarantee of close friends, having discussed all the details and concluding an agreement;
G you are looking for a nanny through friends or an agency.

Imagine that you are offered to install hidden cameras to keep an eye on your new nanny.

(we do not consider the material side).
A you hope that the child will tell you everything himself, and the nanny will not dare to do something wrong;
B you refuse indignantly (people need to be trusted);
IN agree (safety, baby’s health comes first);
G you are at a loss (if you agree, it is without enthusiasm).

Teachers, neighbors complain about your child...

A you punish your child more severely than you should because he made you look bad in front of strangers;
B protect your son (daughter), not allowing even the thought that he might do something wrong;
IN listen carefully to both sides and, only after thinking, make a decision;
G you scold the baby for show, showing that you are keeping him strict, and you yourself wink imperceptibly: they say, this is for fun.

The child did not comply with the request to put away toys, learn homework...

A you achieve your goal at any cost, even if it comes to hysterics and sobs;
B you clean everything yourself, and ask him to do his homework when it’s convenient for him;
IN you can turn everything into a game, but you conduct business in such a way that the request is eventually fulfilled;
G you try to persuade, but if it doesn’t work, you give in.

The child asks to buy him an expensive toy that he cannot afford now.

A you strictly stop “negotiations” (“You already have plenty to play with”);
B find funds and buy;
IN frankly admit: “We don’t have that kind of money now”;
G distract attention by offering something cheaper.

You made a mistake. Can you admit this to your child?

The kid begs to buy a puppy (kitten, hamster...).

A without explanation, make the decision you see fit;
B agree: you cannot refuse him (her) anything;
IN you discuss together whether there are conditions for this (a dog is not a toy);
G trying to “pay off” with a toy dog.

Do you want your son (daughter) to grow up like you?

A of course, the child should try to be like his parents;
B the main thing is that he himself is satisfied;
IN this is stupid: it must be different, it is not some kind of clone. Let him be better, happier than his parents;
G it is not in your power, you cannot be either “for” or “against”.

Do you agree that the only child in a family is often spoiled by his parents, countless grandmothers, and grows up like the “navel of the earth”?

A he must be brought up in strictness;
B even though his childhood will be cloudless, he will still have plenty of troubles;
IN there is such a danger, but it all depends on the parents;
G let him be spoiled, but in moderation.

In difficult situations in your relationship with your baby, should you contact a psychologist?

A no, no one can solve any problems better than a mother;
B if it would be better for the child;
IN You need to contact a psychologist before the situation becomes difficult. Then it will be much harder;
G only in special cases.

Do you think it is true that while the child is small, he can be allowed to do everything?

A no, he must obey his elders, do small but important work for the family;
B I completely agree;
IN if you allow him everything, then a “little monster” will grow up, how can you then wean him from the habit of doing whatever he wants?
G not all, but a lot.

Do you listen to other people's advice about raising children?

A I don’t listen to anyone - my parents know better;
B the main thing is that the child is happy;
IN I listen to everyone, but I make decisions myself;
G if necessary.

Do you think that your child should go to kindergarten?

A Necessarily. In the most ordinary;
B It is best to raise him at home, under the supervision of his mother, or, as a last resort, send him to some extraordinary, beautiful garden;
IN The garden is very important for the child’s communication with others like himself, what is called “socialization”. How will he then go to school and communicate with his peers?
G It’s good at home, and it can be good in the garden.

The child does not eat well and prefers sweets to normal food.

A you argue with him “until he’s blue in the face,” but force him to finish everything;
B let him do what he wants, you cannot force him;
IN you indulge in all sorts of tricks, offer to cook together (the game “I cook it myself, I eat it myself”), say that this is a “space” soup for those who fly to Mars...
G you are glad that he ate at least a little porridge, and you hide the cakes.

Imagine that your child has become too fat.

A start a serious conversation about the benefits of active recreation, give positive examples;
B what can I do?
IN If you don’t wash it, you force him to run and walk by skiing, you get on skis yourself, you hint that fat people are being teased...
G Or maybe it's genetically predisposed?

In kindergarten or school, your child is laughed at for not being very fashionable.

A trying to convince the child that they only meet people by their clothes;
B rush to the best store and buy the most fashionable clothes (he should have all the best);
IN choose something more acceptable from your existing wardrobe;
G move the conversation to another topic.

An agency calls you and offers to make a “TV star” out of your child, but not for free.

A there can be no question of payment; it is still unknown who is doing whom a favor;
B gladly agree, pay any expenses, if necessary, borrow; maybe sell your car, your apartment...
IN ask not to call again (a normal child should grow up, games of being a star “break” even adults, let alone a baby);
G if you agree, then without much joy, if the costs are small.

Your child is too interested in the computer and surfing the Internet. Do you mind?

A only under your control if he learns his homework and helps around the house;
B if he wants, then let him play;
IN The Internet is wonderful, but you can go there where it would be better not for an adult to go. And computer “shooters” are not a very smart activity, they don’t give much. So no more than an hour a day. I still need to do my homework, take a walk, read, play chess...
G he gets bored and quits.

Are your children considered sneaks?

A the child must share everything with teachers and parents;
B if he was offended, he should complain;
IN no, among peers this is considered a great sin, no one will hang out with them;
G it all depends on the circumstances.

Can you call your baby greedy?

A not greedy, but thrifty: you give everything, but what are you left with?
B my child is not capable of anything bad;
IN I even restrain him, he is ready to give everything away;
G depending on what and to whom to give.

Your opinion: how important is it for a child to communicate with peers?

A but these must be children from decent families;
B For what? After all, he has me!
IN it is very important;
G This is not an end in itself, the main thing is the level of communication.

How do you rate the statement: “Parents are always right?”

A absolutely right;
B this is what you dream about;
IN completely disagree;
G you don't like the word "always".

If you have the majority of answers:

"A". You treat your child too harshly, you are a dictator. Your version of parenting is a time bomb. You “break” your child, his “I”, individuality, and he looks into your mouth; and then, most likely, in adolescence, he will disobey and rebel. The result can be sad. You need to seriously change your approach to parenting.

"B". You forgive your baby everything and don’t allow the thought that he might do something wrong. But this doesn’t happen! Your baby is not an elf, but a living creature. This way you can spoil him and raise him to be a “mama’s boy.” You know the saying: what kind of mother are you if you can’t feed your own daughter until retirement - that’s about you. Think about it.

"IN". You, one might say, are the Ushinsky or Pestalozzi of our time. A wonderful, wise mother. The main thing that you managed to achieve is love, understanding and trust in your relationship with your child. The only danger is that the fairly democratic style of upbringing that you profess (for example, a daughter is a friend, a son is a friend) can erase the necessary boundaries between child and adult and create excessive familiarity. But I think you understand this.

"G". Your strong point is compromise. You would be an excellent diplomat or negotiator. But everything has reasonable limits. Of course, there is no doubt about your love for your child. But the suspicion arises that you do not have a certain system in upbringing. Today you can allow everything, tomorrow you can prohibit everything. This can confuse anyone. The little man senses your self-doubt and turns things to his advantage. Tests the boundaries of what is acceptable... So, in the end, the baby can sit on your neck. Think: where does your desire to compromise come from? From an indecisive character? Or are you very busy with yourself and work? In any case, you should contact a good psychologist.

Every mother has her own idea of ​​motherhood, care and love. Take this test and find out your maternal character.

1. People say that you should breastfeed as long as possible. My point of view:

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2. Where your child sleeps/will sleep:

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3. What type of diapers do you use?

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4. Will you spank (are you already spanking) your children?

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5. When it comes to kindergarten/school, my child will:

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6. How do you feel about vaccinations?

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7. What do you do when your baby's pacifier falls on the floor or ground?

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8. When will you introduce/have introduced complementary foods?

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9. What food do you feed your family?

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10. What is your child's favorite toy?

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What kind of mother are you?

In this case, the prefix eco has nothing to do with the procedure of fertilization outside the body, but means the mother’s love for everything natural and natural. Your core life beliefs:

• Sling instead of a stroller
• Homeopathy as a medicine,
• Only natural food.

Vaccinations, fast food, microwaves, smartphones and the monstrous urban ecology - you want to run away from all this: to the country, to India or Cambodia, where there are no GMOs, the Unified State Exam and you don’t need to spend money on winter overalls.

You'll get

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What kind of mother are you?

Alpha mom

Your parenting is based on attachment theory, which involves creating a strong emotional connection with your child. You enjoy hugging your child in your bed, trying to quickly respond to his signals so that he always feels safe.

It is important for you to be in contact with your child, but not to become an errand mom.

Such a confident position of motherhood is very reassuring to the child; it is calm and safe for him to be near you.

You'll get a handy reminder on the most common causes of whims + 3 video lessons with recommendations for communicating with a naughty child!

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What kind of mother are you?

mom "Come what may"

You do not adhere to any single line of motherhood, you act according to circumstances. You may allow your baby to cry after sleeping together for a long time.

You are against corporal punishment but prefer that his behavior be predictable and controllable.

You like convenient and simple schemes for raising and living with a child.

You'll get a handy reminder on the most common causes of whims + 3 video lessons with recommendations for communicating with a naughty child!

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What kind of mother are you?

Traditional mom

Your parenting is based on tradition. Most likely, you use the same rules and principles of education as your parents. You are sure that respect for your parents is a very important character trait and you strive to achieve it with all your might.

You'll get a handy reminder on the most common causes of whims + 3 video lessons with recommendations for communicating with a naughty child!

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GO AGAIN!

First of all, look at yourself from the outside: what if something is really wrong? Our test will help you do this.

1. Deep down, you are sure that your baby:

A) the only normal child you know;
b) the most intelligent, talented, beautiful;
V) individuality that must be protected;
G) ordinary, like all children;
d) is not developing quite correctly.

2. What you like most to buy for your child:

A) everything is expensive;
b) educational toys, gadgets;
V) goodies, clothes;
G) something economical so as not to spend extra money;
d) healthy food and/or medical and cosmetic services.

3. Today you can buy second-hand children's clothes cheaply. Do you allow yourself to do this?

A) never;
b) only if these are some special things;
V) I buy only those things whose prices in regular stores I consider unreasonably high;
G) yes, often;
d) Yes, it’s just a pity that you rarely come across something decent.

4. What in your baby’s behavior causes your irritation?

A) never and nothing;
b) refusal to eat;
V) whims;
G) causeless screams;
d) sloppiness.

5. How much time a day do you spend communicating with your child?

A) if he’s not sleeping, I’m always with him;
b) few hours;
V) less than half an hour;
G) all the time that remains from other matters;
d) less than we would like.

6. Do you consider the birth of a child to be the main achievement of your life?

A) and the only one;
b) one of the main ones;
V) There are many good things associated with a child, but this is not the main thing;
G) I don’t consider it an achievement, it just brings a lot of joy;
d) I don’t think so, because giving birth is not as difficult as raising and teaching.

7. Was it difficult for you to have a child?

A) yes, it was terrible;
b) how difficult it must be for everyone;
V) easier than many;
G) I was lucky - there were and are no particular problems with him;
d) the main problems begin after birth.

Calculate your points using the table

	A	b	V	G	d
1	0	3	10	4	5
2	0	3	7	10	5
3	0	3	10	7	5
4	0	7	10	5	3
5	0	10	5	7	3
6	0	7	5	10	3
7	0	7	10	5	3

From 0 to 20 points - mother hen. Usually sacrifices his personal life, career, hobbies for the sake of his baby. His every whim is fulfilled, but the mother’s expectations are too high: she is subconsciously sure that now the child owes her his whole life.

From 21 to 34 points - mother-producer. Subconsciously strives to squeeze the maximum out of the child’s abilities. She wants to see his superiority in everything over his peers. Most likely, the woman herself in the past had a hard time realizing that she was imperfect.

From 35 to 48 points - mother is an actress. She considers the child a pleasant decoration of her life. She caresses him when she likes him, and pushes him away if she is busy. Such mothers have a phone number full of nannies; they always need assistants, grandmothers, and wise advice from friends.

From 49 to 70 points - mother-friend. From the outside it may seem rather indifferent to the child. So he fell and burst into tears, and she said with a smile something like “he’ll heal before the wedding.” She constantly teaches the child something, but as if gradually, unobtrusively. Allows him to make mistakes and take risks within reasonable limits.

The birth of a child sharpens various aspects of a woman’s character, and her behavior ultimately affects the baby. How will the child grow up - an inquisitive tomboy or a fearful touchy-feely? This can be predicted now by assessing the attitude towards it moms. A test will help you look at yourself from the outside and, perhaps, change something about yourself.

1. When it’s time to go to the maternity hospital:

A. You pack at the last minute.
b. You prepared everything a few weeks ago.
V. You prepared everything months ago.

2. You are breastfeeding:

A. As long as he asks for it.
b. Before going to work.
V. Just a few days: you are worried that your milk supply is low.

3. At 8 months:

A. You give your baby store-bought baby food.
b. You alternate between store-bought and home-cooked meals.
V. Every time you prepare vegetable puree for him yourself.

4. Photo album of your child:

A. Looks like a shoebox with all the photos piled up in it.
b. Reflects only the most important events (birthday, Christmas).
V. Filled with photographs, small memories, comments.

5. Your baby is 11 months old. At night his temperature suddenly rises. You:

A. You give him a children's dose of paracetamol and go back to bed.
b. Give him a children's dose of paracetamol and stay close until his fever subsides.
V. Call your pediatrician immediately.

6. At 5 a.m. your six-month-old baby starts screaming:

A. You will take the baby into your bed for the rest of the night.
b. You wait a few minutes before approaching and then explain to him that he needs to sleep.
V. You will approach him and stay next to him until he falls asleep.

7. What do you do when your baby drops his pacifier on the floor?

A. Wipe it off with a paper handkerchief.
b. Rinse with water.
V. Wash it immediately with hot water and then sterilize it.

8. Your nine-month-old baby grabs onto pieces of furniture and tries to touch everything:

A. You allow him to do this, because he discovers the world for himself!
b. You tell him “no” every time he goes near something dangerous.
V. You cleared the entire space beforehand, fearing that he would get hurt.

9. Toys you buy for your child:

A. Creates the least amount of noise.
b. They entertain him the most.
V. Most educational.

10. On your baby's first birthday, you:

A. Place one candle in the cake and take photos.
b. Bake a sweet pie and invite your friends.
V. Prepare for three days of celebration.

Now count which answers you have more - a, b or c.

"Cool" mom

If your answers are predominantly “a”, you are “cool” mom (in other words, a supporter of free).

Such a mother is a woman who follows her instincts. During pregnancy, she did what she wanted (continued to have fun in the evenings, make love until the last day). Her own mother was a supporter of permissiveness (and to this day also serves as her example) or, conversely, too strict, and such behavior is a kind of protest. She dotes on her child. Having read the entire Françoise Dolto from cover to cover, she considers him a little man who knows what he needs. She breastfed him (because it was not difficult for her) for as long as he asked (up to two years and longer). She does not have clearly defined principles of education. She doesn't strive to be a good housewife: if the baby doesn't want lunch, let him eat chips.

Her strengths: Cheerfulness, energy. The child looks like her and blooms like a sunflower in a field.

Her weaknesses: Some carelessness, particularly in terms of food safety and hygiene.

"Ideal" mother

If your answers are predominantly “b”, you are an “ideal” mother, Madame, “who does everything right.”

Such a mother makes a lot of efforts to succeed in everything. She constantly tries to find a middle ground: she is strict, enthusiastic, but in moderation; prudent, but not alarmist; organized, but without fanaticism. She doesn't worry about trifles. Surely she already has some experience with children: perhaps she took care of her brothers and sisters. She breastfeeds her baby until the end of maternity leave. She has strict principles: you only eat at certain times and with certain foods! At the same time, she knows how to be flexible and buys products that make life easier (for example, ready-made baby food).

Her strengths: Sticks to the golden mean and tries to follow the principles of common sense.

Her weaknesses: The methods are good, but perhaps a little old-fashioned.

Worried mom

If your answers are predominantly “c”, you are a worried mother.

This lady is restless by nature, and when it comes to a precious baby, then her anxiety knows no bounds! Sleepless nights during pregnancy (she often dreams that her little daughter is born with a beard!), anxiety during childbirth (“Tell me, doctor, is it normal that 72 hours have passed?”) and real anxiety when she is holding the hands of your baby. She wants to do everything right, but she can’t get rid of the anxiety: why didn’t he eat everything from the bottle? Why is he capricious? The poor thing constantly torments herself with questions, and sooner or later the child begins to realize this. She takes too much care of him, literally shaking over him. She poisons her life with questions about whether she is a good mother and whether she correctly follows the recommendations of the pediatrician.

Her strengths: Food hygiene, cleanliness. Child safety is at its best.

Her weaknesses: With a nervous mother, the child also becomes nervous.

Discussion

My mother is a very calm and positive person. And I was very nervous throughout my childhood and part of my adult life.
This is unlikely to be a true article.

I was glad that I turned out to be the “Ideal Mom”. Especially with regard to strict principles, this is not about me at all) That’s how it always is with these tests)

Comment on the article "What kind of mother are you? Test: look at yourself from the outside"

Yesterday my daughter and I watched the series “House with Lilies” on Channel One. My daughter is eight years old. The film showed life in the post-war years. And there, she and I saw a moment that touched me and my daughter to the depths of our souls and forced us to reconsider many views on raising children. This moment began with the girl Lilia picking a lily flower from a flowerbed to take it into her mother Margarita’s room and put it in a vase. When she walked in, she immediately saw her mother’s mirror, on which there were many...

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PART 1 I wanted to start my story with how the idea of ​​changing my diet came to me. At some point, I looked from the outside at my life, the life of my family and friends, and this is what I saw: people’s great attachment to food, and the more a person eats, the more he wants. If you're upset - you need to eat, bored - you need to eat something, if you want to chat with friends - buy sweets or drinks with chips, meeting with relatives comes down to eating delicious food, and you have to do it in two hours...

I'm looking for a job. Question: where do single mothers work and how do they manage to combine it (if there are no assistants)? I wouldn’t like for the children to be abandoned, but it probably won’t work out any other way?

For example, my husband does this strictly once every two weeks, neither more nor less often, and his parents never call him at all (except to congratulate him on his birthday), which I greatly envy him for, since my mother considers 3 calls per week the norm. day.

I found on one site [link-1] a cool classification of mothers - according to their attitude towards food.. It turns out to be a lot of fun))) Mom-Malysheva, Mom-Malakhova, Mom-Animushka, etc... Mom-“Malysheva” This mommy watches over feeding their dearest children fanatically and closely. During the day, you won’t find mayonnaise and ketchup, full-fat sour cream or flavored yogurt in her refrigerator. When trying to cook sausages for his offspring, dad gets hit on the head with a Zepter frying pan (we fry without oil!). Mom's principles...

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The topic stated in this link is, of course, not a simple one: [link-1] Moreover, the question is hypothetical without a real-life situation. As far as I can judge, and as far as I can see from the responses of the participants in the discussion, the development of events can, in principle, move only according to 2 scenarios. 1) A woman with a cold and indifferent (or for some other reason unloving) mother does not receive the experience of self-love and, accordingly, cannot pass it on to her children. 2) A woman begins to build her family from...

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